The Great Probing

I share these because they have been a great blessing in my life. I hope you gain as much encouragement from them as I do! =) July 9th.

"Ye cannot serve the Lord." Joshua 24:19 Have you the slightest reliance on anything other than God? Is there a remnant of reliance left on any natural virtue, any set of circumstances? Are you relying on yourself in any particular in this new proposition which God has put before you? That is what the probing means. It is quite true to say - "I cannot live a holy life," but you can decide to let Jesus Christ make you holy. "Ye cannot serve the Lord God"; but you can put yourself in the place where God's almighty power will come through you. Are you sufficiently right with God to expect Him to manifest His wonderful life in you? "Nay, but we will serve the Lord." It is not an impulse, but a deliberate commitment. You say - But God can never have called me to this, I am too unworthy, it can't mean me. It does mean you, and the weaker and feebler you are, the better. The one who has something to trust in is the last one to come anywhere near saying - "I will serve the Lord." We say - "If I really could believe!" The point is - If I really will believe. No wonder Jesus Christ lays such emphasis on the sin of unbelief. "And He did not many mighty works there because of their unbelief." If we really believed that God meant what He said - what should we be like! Dare I really let God be to me all that He says He will be?

My Utmost for His Highest

Excerpt from good ol' Ozzie.

Are You Obsessed by Something?

"Who is the man that fears the Lord?"

—Psalm 25:12

Are you obsessed by something? You will probably say, "No, by nothing," but all of us are obsessed by something— usually by ourselves, or, if we are Christians, by our own experience of the Christian life. But the psalmist says that we are to be obsessed by God. The abiding awareness of the Christian life is to be God Himself, not just thoughts about Him. The total being of our life inside and out is to be absolutely obsessed by the presence of God. A child’s awareness is so absorbed in his mother that although he is not consciously thinking of her, when a problem arises, the abiding relationship is that with the mother. In that same way, we are to "live and move and have our being" in God ( Acts 17:28  ), looking at everything in relation to Him, because our abiding awareness of Him continually pushes itself to the forefront of our lives.

If we are obsessed by God, nothing else can get into our lives— not concerns, nor tribulation, nor worries. And now we understand why our Lord so emphasized the sin of worrying. How can we dare to be so absolutely unbelieving when God totally surrounds us? To be obsessed by God is to have an effective barricade against all the assaults of the enemy.

"He himself shall dwell in prosperity . . ." ( Psalm 25:13 ). God will cause us to "dwell in prosperity," keeping us at ease, even in the midst of tribulation, misunderstanding, and slander, if our "life is hidden with Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3). We rob ourselves of the miraculous, revealed truth of this abiding companionship with God. "God is our refuge . . ." ( Psalm 46:1  ). Nothing can break through His shelter of protection.

I just thought I'd share this because it was fantastic.

What a kind and gracious Master I serve!

The year is ending. Reflecting, I realized I could not have asked for something as awesome as what God blessed me with this year. So if you are a herriott girl, this is my heart for you. If you are not a herriott girl, read this anyway and praise God for His saints!
I could sing these girls praises, and tell you of the things God has done through them!
God knew exactly what I needed when He placed me in the Riot this year. He is miraculously kind and infinately gracious to me.
=) It is my joy to serve Him.



I wanted to write and say thank you to all the girls in my life group. They mean so much to me. I could not have planned better friendships. I could not have chosen more loving people. They truly display God's love to me through their lives, through their service to the Lord, through their love not only for me, but for each other. It is contagious. It is exhilarating.
What an amazing blessing they have been to me.
I'll admit I was fearful at the beginning of the year. I am not what people expect me to be. God has graciously given me "a good name" that I do not deserve. But never once have I felt looked down upon; never once have I felt inferior; never once have I felt like any of the girls in my lifegroup saw me as anything less then what God says I am. Their actions have only ever communicated love out of a pure heart that adores the Lord.
They challenge me.
They encourage me.
I feel revitalized after spending time with each one of them.
Each one is concerned for the other parts, and therefore everyone is taken care of! There is no selfishness. God resides in the temple of each of these women! They let the Lord work through their talents, through their gifts, and through their submission to God's will, I get to know the piece of God that has made His home in their hearts! I get to know God's very own Spirit manifested in these awesome women!!

Ladies,
I have seen very few women love the Lord and serve with their hearts the way you love and serve Him. I've seen you choose to give things up for the purpose of the gospel. (things you very easily could've held onto) I've seen you on your "bad days" and seen God's grace poured out on you in a very real and tangible way. I value your honesty more than anything else besides your love for the Lord. You are real with me, you are real with yourselves, and real with each other. Coming from a life of fakes, your honesty and genuineness is a treasure to me. I am afraid to "need" people. I am afraid of being vulnerable because of the power that someone has when they know you. But I am happy to share my life with you, and I do need each one of you.
I am proud to say that =) because over and over you've shown that you really are God's righteousness! (2 Cor 5!!)
Thank you for loving Jesus.
Thank you for sharing your lives with me.
Thank you for your example!
What a blessing you have been to me! I praise God for you! =)

He has done great things, bless His holy name! =)

He will be first

I've been extremely frustrated with my school work recently because everything I do requires me to be creative. I don't get to copy something from a book and turn it in. I must copy what is in my brain and expose it to the world to see, evaluate, ridicule, reject, or ignore. Maybe this doesn't seem like a very big deal, but I'll explain why it is to me.

I am not content to create anything without meaning. I do not think it is possible. Nothing is arbitrary, even when you mean for something to "not have meaning" that is a meaning in itself!
I am doing a lot of designing, for advertisments, for artistic compositions... etc.
I design things with specific purpose. I create compositions by thinking of what I want to communicate and usually pictures come into my head when I visualize my thoughts... that is were my art work comes from... the pictures in my head that express my thoughts.
So this means that everything I create holds some part of me.
This scares me. I think that's completely logical for me to be fearful. It's like a small portion of my heart for other people to critque.
But more than the fear of people knowing me, is my fear of being "appreciated"
Art is not something to be "appreciated" but something to be accepted and understood.
Don't get me wrong... There is a place for the kind of art work that just "looks pretty", but I would challenge the definition of art as something more than eye candy.
So my fear is not of someone critiquing my technique, or my use of color, my fear is that my work, that is part of me, will not be given the value that I give it myself; that my work will be misunderstood for something it is not; that I will not effectively communicate my heart; that people will not realize that it is my heart. The object becomes me; not a canvas, but my heart in acrylic form.

How does the Lord fit into this?

God is an artist. He created the entire world. I do not think any of His creation is arbitrary either! If I am sinful and human and I am not satisfied to make work that does not hold meaning, do you think that the Holy God of the universe created anything without meaning?
And can I say that I do not think God sent his Son into the world to be "appreciated", but He sent him so we would accept Him, and understand who He is!!
He has put his heart ever before us! Everything He created is an expression of His being! Although fallen and defaced, this Earth still bears the unmistakable marks of a Master Sculptor.

I asked God to be the Lord of my school.. He is showing me that He will be first.
This is what He's taught me so far
I desire to have my work express who Christ is in me.
to be a replication of His masterpieces, of His heart...
I want to only create in a way that reflects what His creation originally reflected!

I want my art to be a mirror that only ever shows God's truth. His Glory.
It is for Him.
It is to make known who He is.
And only ever for these things do I want to create.

Cause me to be unable to produce something if it is not true.

Cause me to fall into a creative slum if I cease to glorify you in my work.

Block my words. Blind my eyes. Break my hands.

If they will not create for You. They will not create at all.

The Relational Kingdom of God

I was out sharing last thursday. There were three of us, so we took turns walking in pairs of two while the third person prayed. During my time praying I realized a few things I'd like to share.

I was walking and looking at people, and I realized

I can understand the big picture of salvation, and what that means for the world, and I can understand how the body of Christ functions, but the kingdom of God is about individuals. 

The kingdom of God is about that one man's story, about that woman's hurts, about that child's dreams, and how God wants to take them and make them into something beautiful that glorifies Him! God is concerned about what that lady had to go through this morning while trying to get her kids to school, He is concerned about the payroll check that didn't go through for the guy working construction and trying to provide for his two kids that don't know their mother, He is interested in the picture that the child drew for her sister, He is thinking of the teenage girl who wants so badly to be loved that she destroys her body through the way she eats or doesn't eat... 

His heart is moved to compassion for the weak, the broken, the sinful...

The kingdom of God is not about "people" in the general sense, but about each individual person in the relational sense.

Understanding that, be moved to compassion by the things God cares about; each person's stories, hurts, the sins that continually trap them. 

God desires to free them so he can lavish

Lavish

Lavish

His love on them.

Forever Engulfed by His grace, His forgiveness, His freedom!!!

I believe that is His desire.

When someone is loved, it shows by the way they act. You can tell when someone is loved, their whole attitude is different! Just look at a woman who is newly engaged, she radiates! 

Every individual person on the face of the Earth is loved by their Creator in a very real, very passionate way. Every person should be able to radiate in the same way that our newly engaged lady does!!!

Even more so!!!

The love of our Savior is infinitely more valuable, more passionate, more REAL, then the love of another human could ever, or can ever be.

Do you believe that? Really, truly  believe it?

It is true.

It is more real than the chair you are sitting on.

God's love is just as real in a strangers life, as it is in mine.

I can do nothing without Him.

His desire is for people, so my desire must be for them as well.

He has passionately and lovingly proposed to every person, and He asks me to make his proposal known.

I am relaying His affections.

His affections are not determined by status, appearance, power, money, knowledge, education, infirmities, talents, personalities, or anything else we may noticed about a person.

Also, have a quiet time at the valley west mall sometime. Sit on the coach, watch people.. read God's word.. and when it says, "Preach the word in and out of season"

... You have no excuse not to obey.

Because of Your Love

Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities , but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.

1 Corinthians 12:4-7

Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.

1 Corinthians 12:27

Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? Do all possess gifts of healing? Do all speak with tongues? Do all interpret? But earnestly desire the higher gifts.

And I will show you a still more excellent way.

1 Corinthians 12:29-31

Paul finishes writing 1 Corinthians 12 by saying he will show the Corinthians a more excellent way to pursue the higher spiritual gifts, then he talks to them about love. I had never before noticed that the reason he is writing about love has to do with spiritual gifts. When Paul writes, "If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal", he is making reference to someone desiring the gift of tongues. Likewise....

"And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains but have not love, I am nothing."

refers to someone having or desiring the gift of prophecy.

"Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture! But when full understanding comes, these partial things will become useless."

1 Corinthians 13:8-10

Prophecies have passed away, the gift of tongues is inactive, knowledge continues to pass away, the gifts that remain are gifts of love.

What does that mean for us today?

"All these are empowered by one and the same Spirit, who apportions to each one individually as he wills."

1 Corinthians 12:11

All gifts are empowered through the love of God that is made manifest to us through the Holy Spirit!

The goal of every gift is to build up the body ("To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good")

Without love, we are nothing.

God is love.

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love" 1 John 4:7-8

If God is love then it would makes sense that every characteristic of love is a characteristic of God because love is His nature.

Therefore....

God is patient, God is kind. He does not envy, He does not boast, He is not proud. He is not rude, He is not self-seeking, He is not easily angered, He keeps no record of wrongs. God does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. He always protects, He always trusts, He always hopes, He always perseveres. God never fails.

I think the goal of all this is that when it comes down to salvation the goal is love, is for us to know God; to know God is to know love.

People are vessels which can emit tremendous amounts of love. God made us that way. God is a god of order, of balance. This capacity is not a one way capacity, since we have the capacity for love, we must also have the capacity for hate, for pain, for rejection, and anything contrary to love.

You are an instrument.

What will you emit?

Light?

Can you emit light?

What enables you to emit light?

There is only one light, anything else you choose to emit is toxic to the world around you, to the people around you. If you choose not to emit light, you poison yourself, the Christians around you, and you continue to suffocate those who already are starved of the light.

Journaling again =)

Some verses, followed by some thoughts that may or may not relate to the verses.  =)

"For not by their own sword did they win the land, 

nor did their own arm save them, but your right hand and your arm, 

and the light of your face, for you delighted in them." 

Psalm 44:3

"If we had forgotten the name of our God 

or spread out our hands to a foreign god, 

would not God discover this? 

For he knows the secrets of the heart."

Psalm 44:20-21

"The Lord does not let the righteous go hungry, 

but he thwarts the cravings of the wicked." 

Proverbs 10:3

What do the wicked crave?

What do the righteous hunger for?

"Doing wrong is like a joke to a fool, 

but wisdom is pleasure to a man of understanding" 

Proverbs 10:23

"What the wicked dreads will come up on him 

but the desire of the righteous will be granted" 

Proverbs 10:24

Thoughts

God is the light. He wins the victory... the "light of your face" only within his light am I shown for what I truly am. Any light besides Jesus Christ will not show what is true.

Art, without light, is no longer dynamic. 

Art appears differently under different lights! 

Any light besides Jesus Christ will not show what is true.

I've been thinking a lot about how much joy I get from creating... 

Madeline L'Engle talked about this some in the book Walking on Water (which I recommend =) ) She said something to the effect of... God is first and foremost an artist, because He is the Creator, we come to know him in a deeper way when we create. Each person has a desire to create, because each person is a reflection of God. 

We create different things, but we all desire to create whether you're "artistic" or not.

All artwork is a replication of something that already exists. 

Every line is inspired by a line I've seen somewhere in God's creation. 

Every color is a replication of a color that existed in God before He painted it into his creation. Nothing I create is original. Yes, it is an oozing of my soul, but my soul is a reflection of a part of God's soul, and therefore nothing I create is my own. 

Because of the nature of art... that it is an expressive replication.. I wonder why I get so much joy from creating it... 

I think of it as an expression of my soul... but I've been thinking more recently about how much I experience the Lord when I create, 

when I write, 

when I sing.

God has given me so many things that I enjoy... so many things that I love to do, things I am good at, things that other people see... but when it comes down to it, do I let that determine who I am? Do I let the things God has blessed me with define me? 

Or do I really belong to the Lord?

This is an old song that comes to mind, I absolutely love it.. 

It was my prayer last summer and will continue to be as my life continues...

All I once held dear built my life upon

All this world reveres and wars to own

All I once thought gain I have counted loss

spent and worthless now compared to this

Knowing you, Jesus

Knowing you

There is no greater thing

You're my all

You're the best

You're my joy, 

my righteousness

and I love you, Lord

Now my hearts desire is to know You more

to be found in You and known as Yours

to possess by faith what I could not earn

all surpassing gift of righteousness

Knowing You, Jesus, knowing You

there is no greater thing

You're my all

You're the best

You're my joy, my righteousness

And I love You, Lord.

Oh to know the power of your risen life

and to know You in Your sufferings

to become like You in Your death my Lord

so with you to live and never die

Knowing You

Jesus, knowing You

There is no greater thing

You're my all, You're the best

You're my joy, my Righteousness

and I love You

Lord

There are things I love, things that I see myself as... 

Daughter?

Singer?

Writer?

Artist?

Designer?

Cheerleader?

Other ways I wouldn't mind being defined... 

Beautiful?

Successful?

but at the end of the day...

I do not need to be anything other than His.